PRACTICE: From Obligation to Opportunity

Write a list of at least five things that you have to do this week. Your  responsibilities and obligations - your “to-do” list. Begin each item with the words “I have  to . . .” Some examples: 

I have to pay bills.
I have to go grocery shopping.
I have to go to the dentist.
I have to make an overdue phone call.
I have to do laundry.
I have to fix the kitchen light.
I have to do errands for my neighbor.
I have to take care of my _____.

Now cross out the words “I have to” and begin each line with the words “I get to.” Notice how different it feels to think that you “get to” do something. How does this shift the energy you bring to each task? 

Throughout your day, catch yourself whenever you think, “I have  to . . .” and try to substitute with “I get to.” You can also try adding, “because I can” to the end of your “get-to” statements. This can help you see your tasks as privileges you may not have always had and may not always have in the future, and that many people do not have at all. Begin to notice how much other people use obligated language in day-to-day conversations. Experiment with seeing, and claiming, your responsibilities and obligations as privileges and opportunities. 

What are some obligations or responsibilities in your life you would like to feel more generous towards and more grateful about? Try this practice whenever you are feeling burdened by doing something and see what arises for you.